The Jeremiah Story

On June 26th, 2011 I went into active labor. I remember before going to the hospital hugging and rubbing my belly knowing this will be one of the last times I will be able to do it. By the time we made it to the hospital I was already 2-3 minutes apart. We were blessed to have some amazing nurses. All three of my nurses were Christians and spoke Word into our lives. After pushing for maybe an hour we were able to hear the cry of Jeremiah Caeden Woolsey being born. God blessed us with 48, beautiful, minutes with him. During those few minutes he was able to meet his big brother and grandparents. We could have not asked for anything better! Malachi was so excited to meet his little brother. He kept saying, “baby, baby Jeremiah.” Malachi touched and kissed all over Jeremiah and let him know, “I luv you!” To this day Malachi every now and then asks about Jeremiah wanting to know where he is. Once he even asked if Jeremiah could go to the zoo with him. Even though Jeremiah had "defects" he was just perfect. Had had a head full of long dark drown hair. He had his daddy’s legs and his mommy’s claque. He was beautiful!! The birth of Jeremiah was bitter sweet. We were glad to finally meet our son, but at the same time we knew we were going to have to say good bye. Leaving the hospital and the weeks after were very difficult. I felt like I had a stamp on my forehead that said, “Mom of a lost child". This feeling has decreased since then, but does not make being in public any easier. When Jeremiah passed a part of my hert went with him. I have learned how to live on, but the sting is still there. There is not a day I don’t think of Jeremiah. I know the days ahead will be hard, ie Christmas, no “Babies First Christmas” ornament, no stocking, no baby Christmas bib or outfit. This has been the hardest thing I, we have ever had to do…. But I would do it all over again, just to have those 48 minutes back!! You always hear of things like this happening to others, but I never thought it would happen to me. I know I did everything to help my child, including falling on my knees. I don’t question God, I just trust! For those of you who don’t know the birth of Jeremiah was a miracle in itself. It was explained to us that Jeremiah should have been a miscarried pregnancy but he was not. He should have never made it to 30 weeks but he did. He should have never made it to full term but he did. He should have not even lived through the birthing process but he did. So even though Jeremiah passed away, he still was a miracle baby. For me there is no anger there is just Peace. I know where my child is and I know one day we will be reunited. I know there is a reason, and I will never be able to understand in full. What I do know is that God desires for other’s to hear The Jeremiah Story and that is what I am going to do. I am a mom of an angel and I praise God for my angel!

JeReMIah

As many of you know this past February we began to live every parents worse nightmare. We found out our unborn son, Jeremiah had Trisonomy 13. Knowing what the end result would be we decided to continue on our sons life and to rejoice everyday we have him. February to now has been an emotional roller coaster. In May we had a scare. Jeremiah's heart rate was high above 200. All I could think was, "I am not ready to let go... it is to early..." God blessed us and had Jeremiah's heart rate go back to normal. The doctors could not explain why it happened or why it went back to normal, but they too were glad to see his heart rate go back to 151. At 5:30am on June 26 we went into labor and had Jeremiah at 12:05pm. Jeremiah was beautiful. He had long dark hair and Malachi's nose. He also had his daddy's legs. He weighed 4.9lbs and was 19.1in long, just as long as Malachi when he was born. He lived for 48 minutes. During those 48 minutes he got to meet his big brother who just LOVED all over him. Kevin and I could not have asked for anything better. He was so sweet and loving to his little brother. Malachi loved him so much that he wanted to know "Where's the baby" when Jeremiah was no longer with us. The fact that Malachi still talks about him, a month after he was born, lets us know that those 48 minutes were worth everything we went through. God blessed us so much with Jeremiah. We pray that he will continue to be a testimony and that he will impact many. We have been very blessed to have such loving friends and family and are thankful for all of you.

A CraShING STOP

So, YES it has been forever since we have bloged last... so sorry!! However, on our defences LIFE has gotten way, way to crazy for us. As many of you know back in September we heard clearly from God to "SUBMIT" and move to Ireland. In October we found out we were pregnant with our second and beautiful son, Jeremiah. Even with such exciting news we were preparing our budget and prayer letters for Ireland to send out to all of our wonderful family and friends who trust and love the Lord. In February we were given the HORRIBLE news that our Jeremiah will not live very long after birth if he even makes it to that point. Our WORLD came to a crashing STOP!! After many differnt doctor visit's, to two differnt hospitals, we have come to the relization that there is NOTHING we can do but TRUST that GOD IS IN CONTROl; and Praise God we don't have control!! We have also come to relieze that Jeremeiah is not at all a burden, but a blessing. Even though we are preparing ourselves for this STORM, if you will, that is soon to come it is so hard to get through the everyday little storms. No matter how long we will have our beutiful gift from above we will love him and be the best parents he will ever have. Malachi has been so wonderful through all of this and very LOVING!! I would not use the phrase "terrible two's" for him at all. Malachi understands there is a baby in mommy's belly who we all very much love, but he has NO CLUE that his brother will more than likely never come home from the hospital. We can not wait for the moment that Malachi gets to meet his little brother and to see the instant love that he will have for him. For those of you who are wondering how does that play in with Ireland, I will let you know we are still planning on moving but our time line has changed. We know what God has said and we will not let the Devil steal that from us. When we went to that doctor's appointment in February we had no clue our life was about to forever change but it has; we had no clue that on that day we will understand what the phrase, "I am always thinking about it" truly means but we do; We had no clue that we were about to hear the doctor's utter the phrase, "You have choices"... to end or continue the life of your child we ofcourse continued it; we had no clue that we were going to have to face the idea of burying our child in the same week he is birthed; this list could go on. What we knew is that NO MATTER WHAT We WILL Praise The Lord!!!